This weekend was busy.
Saturday….
First I trimmed some of the hedges along the house. With chainsaw, hedge trimmer, and tools in hand I braved the windy and very cool, damp weather in an effort to trim the seven foot bushes down to one foot stubs so they can branch out all full and pretty next spring. I manage to get the back of the house finished (I have bushes around all four sides against the house) before it was time for college football. My wife looked out the living room window at the bush debris and complemented me on doing such a quick job on the bushes. Boy did she get a surprise when I told her that there was another stack of limbs and leaves in the back of the house and that I had only finished one side.
So I took a break and listened to my college alma mater (it was an away game) beat the crap out of I-A team (my alma mater is I-AA school). It was kinda close there for awhile, but during the second half my boys went at the opposing team with something akin to blood lust. Take that Cambridge Scholars!
So after the game I went back outside to finish the bush trimming (yeah, I’d rather had done some other bush trimming, if you know what I mean, but it was not to be). I was a mad man with the chainsaw and the trimmer. It took me the rest of the day, but I finished it. Just don’t ask about the privacy hedges that ring the property.
Then Sunday came…
Slept really late, too late to go to church (I admit it, I wasn’t to broke up about it). After a little lunch, I sat down to watch my pro-boys The Atlanta Falcons play some NFL ball. There was much yelling at the TV and much rejoicing when my pals beat Tampa Bay. After many penalties for my unsportsman like conduct, I went outside and started decoration… for Christmas. If you know me then you know it takes me for-ever to finish decorating for Christmas. Yep, two hours after I started, I have have the roof eves on two sides of the house lined with those icicle lights. I still have a boatload of lights, trees, signs, figurines, and animated animals to put up outside. I don’t even want to think about the decorations on the inside till after Thanksgiving. Since it was late I decided to sit back a watch the Discovery Channel special about JFK and the magic bullet, of which I was not impressed since it kept saying everything was inconclusive.
Sorry, no juicy stories of sex slaves and wild orgies, but I did meet this attractive and hot sister-in-law of my neighbor this weekend.
Today is Rhonda Honey Shear‘s birthday.
I’m not telling you how old she is, but she looks damn good for a woman in her twenties. Yes, I can still remember the sexy Rhonda keeping me up all night on USA. I didn’t care what the movie was, just that the beautiful former Miss Louisiana was the host.
Why just five ye… oh it is the Friday Five.
1) Realistically, where do you think you’ll be five years from now? What job will you be working, will you have family/friends/pets, where will you be living and how?
Five years from now I will probably be at the same job but with a different house and a new car. I certainly hope I have my family, friends, and pets. And I expect my car to fly and run on banana peels.
2) Unrealistically, given a perfect life, where do you want to be five years from now?
Working on my third best seller in a really big house with a house keeper and my kids in really good schools.
3) What’s the big barrier keeping number one and two separate and distinct, or is there one?
Time. I just don’t seem to have the time to write anymore. Plus there is that fame thing.
4) Utterly and completely abandoning realism, make up where you’ll be in five years. Alien abductions and portals to alternate universes are encouraged.
I will be in my second year as the Emperor of All Space because I discovered a faster-than-light drive and how to make everyone immortal. Because of my great achievements and generosity (at not charging for my discoveries) I was set up as honorary Emperor for all eternity (you see, I’m immortal).
5) Where did you believe you’d be now, five years ago? Pick a crucial event of the past five years and tell us where you?d be now if it had been different.
Int the exact same place I am now, but with more money and a better place to live. Crucial, or temporal nexus point? I have absolutely no idea. The last five years have been a blur and fairly uneventful… other than the fact that I am stone poor.
Do your Friday Five.
This is not really a political rant per se, more of a promised response to a comment I left on a post featured at A New York Escorts Confessions. I’m not ranting against the post (since Alexa is posing the site on its educational values and not its political rantings), but the site linked in the post called Fuck The South (sorry for the language). Now this site could be just created all in fun and parody, or it could be how the author really feels… I don’t know. I do know that the site lumps everyone south of Wyoming together as one group and makes some very generalized statements about us.
First of all, being a Georgia boy born and bred and still living here, I see two Souths, the traditional South made up mostly of the southern states east of Texas and the other South that is more traditionally clumped together as part of the West. Usually when you think of the South, you bring to mind the old cotton fields, mansions, slavery, green farmlands surrounded by trees, features more prevalent east of Texas.
Now to the site. “We should have let them go when they wanted to leave….” , we didn’t all want to succeed, in Georgia it was a bitter issue that pit brother against brother — literally. “Fighting for the right to keep slaves…”, if I remember my history correctly, the succession was more about States rights over Federal rights. Slavery was already on its way out of Georgia before the succession. “How about this for arrogant: the South is the Real America….”, we just barely consider ourselves part of the rest of the country, basically we just like to left to our own devices and we sometimes feel like we aren’t even part of America much less feel like the real America.
“Cause we(the north)(sic)… founded this country…”, I hate to burst your bubble but Georgia was one of the original thirteen colonies and a few of the founding fathers came from here and/or represented us. “Second Amendment giving you the right to keep your assault weapons…”, yes, we have a lot of gun owners here in Georgia, but you’ll be hard pressed to find one that thinks the constitution allows a person to keep assault weapons. We use our guns to hunt.. for food! (I was raised on the philosophy of your eat what you kill.)
” All those Federal taxes you love to hate? It all comes from us and goes to you…”, yes, we do get more than we pay in NOW. Remember Jimmy Carter? Just because we voted for him overwhelmingly for president twice, when Carter lost the re-election to Reagan (where was the North then?), Georgia was punished severely for its support of Carter by being excluded from Federal money and having many of the programs it did have cut severely. Even after voting Republican for the next two elections, Georgia was still being punished. Then in 1992 we help elect a Democrat. So now we get one penny more than we pay in to the Federal government, but since we are one of the poorest states we don’t pay in that much either.
Morality. Georgia actually is grouped in the states with the lowest divorce rates (.38% of the population) in the country as of the latest available numbers. While the murder rate is high in comparison to many other states, Georgia is one of the states that is showing the most improvement in reducing the rate. We are not perfect and we don’t pretend to be any more moral than the rest of the country. Yes, there is still a rampant number of homophobes in this state and they tend to panic at the first mention of homosexuals, which explains that amendment that is already being challenged.
No, the South is not perfect. It is as flawed as the rest of the country and it tends to vote and reflect the rest of the country. We are as varied as the North. No, I’m not happy that Shrub won, and I’m not happy that amendment defining marriage passed, but I did my part to fight it and in the next four years I see many more of my fellow Georgians marching with me.
And I really hate people who generalize.
I was looking through my bookmarks today at lunch trying to find something to read as I consumed my meal. I came across The Moonlit Road, a favorite site I haven’t visited in some time. If you like spooky stories with a flair of the ol’ South in ‘em, then this site is for you. It requires free registration to view the text archives, but there is usually two or three new audio stories on the welcome page each month. So turn out the lights, get a comfy blanket, and make sure the doors are locked and bolted when you read and hear these tales, you never know who or what maybe outside.
I just love this! You have got to see this commercial for target with Darth Vader and Heidi Klum. It is soo fanboy!
Yes, the breakfast stealin’ gnome sneaked into my house yesterday and put my breakfast that he/she/it stole on the kitchen counter, right there in plain sight! And my attack cats did nothing to stop her/him/it. Well, I fooled it/her/him this, morning, I manage to bring Pop Tarts®. Take that Cambridge scholars!
And if you guys need anything to start the blood pumping this morning try this link (with a lot of really hot female gyrations and sexual innuendo) I snarked from Alexa (warning: site has adult content). Now I’d join that gym!
And I want my snow now! I want a white Thanksgiving! I am soo jealous of those people who get snow for Thanksgiving. We have the cold weather already, so lets have it with the snow. I could use a few days off from work due to snow.
But then if it snowed here people would panic and all kinds of hell would break out.
Please send snow.
I arrived at work this morning to find that I have apparently forgotten to pack my breakfast bar, my fruit juice, and my decaffeinated Coke because when I opened my briefcase all I had was a package of strawberry flavored sugar wafers. I knew I could last until lunch, even a late lunch, with just the hot cocoa I had in the office. At sometime around 12:30 p.m. my lunch date called to cancel lunch. Now I was really looking forward to my date with my girlfriend (okay, she is my wife) and maybe some FOOD (we don’t have enough time for SEX on our lunch hour unless we do it in the car… hmm, maybe that is a thought). So around 2 p.m. I caved in and started munching on the sugar wafers (guaranteed 100% sugar)… not exactly the healthy diet.
So I’m not running on 5 billion calories and a sugar high (look at the pretty colors mommy).
Doesn’t she have pretty blue eyes. And that smile. If I were a few years younger and a lot more handsome and single, I’d ask her to marry me.. or at least let me wash and massage her feet. I’m and excellent foot washer and massager, just as my wife or any of my past girlfriends. Hell, even Lyndi has had a few of my stress-relieving foot rubs.
Okay, I have this thing about women’s feet… and their eyes… and their smiles…. so sue me and call me a pervert.
Interesting choice of topics for last week’s Friday Five. I told you I would be late this week.
1. What was the nicest thing anyone has ever said to you?
“You are so nice. If I weren’t married already I’d marry you because you are so nice.” That has stuck with me since she said it, about 15 years ago. Truthfully, I would have married her if she wasn’t married. I was really taken by not only her beauty, but her charm and personality. Unfortunately, if we had married, the racial difference would have been met with hostile distaste from my parents (she is African-American while I am WASP).
2. What was the meanest thing anyone has ever said to you?
“You’re ugly and I’d rather kick you in the balls then call you a friend.” Which she did not long afterward. The girl was not as nice a person as I thought and I had to fight hard not to hate her after that remark.
3. At times, lots of people never tell us what they are really thinking. Who is the one person that you would really like to know what they are thinking (as far as how they feel about you), and why?
I can pick any one person, but I can think of six who I would like know that information, but I can’t name them since the all know about this blog. But let me say this to the six, I do love you.
4. What was the nicest thing you have ever said to anyone?
That would be subjective to the person to whom you say it. Sometimes a simple thank you is remembered. The thing I would say from my own viewpoint would be the nicest thing I’ve said was “you make the world a wonderful place to live in.”
5. What was the meanest thing you have ever said to anyone?
On occasion I do have a really mean temper and can say things I regret the minute I utter them. The worse I was when I called a good friend of mine “a whoring bitch” for some trivial matter that I don’t even remember what it was. I do remember that it was not her fault and that she had nothing to do with it, she just happened to be in the line of fire at the time. It took me months of pleading, begging, and penitence to win back her friendship. We managed to patch things up and even became closer. And she has learned not to be around me when I have to take certain medications.
Do your Friday Five.
I get some strange search results to my site sometimes, much like Eden does.
And this in just the past 30 days!
Maybe I should go into the sex blogging business?
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